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Don't drink the Hatorade

Thanks to a questionable decision to pick the Steelers over the Giants, I arrived at work Monday morning and was promptly doused with Tom Heneckers Hatorade. (For those of you who do not work at Denton with me, Tom is our brave and fearless Plant Manager. Im not sure what his job entails, but I assume he must have a background in horticulture.) The Giants beat the crap out of Big Ben, he said. And you call yourself a Giants fan. Okay, Ill admit it. I did a very un-fan-like thing and picked the Steelers over the Giants. For the record, though, Ive never touted myself as a diehard Giants fan. My loyalty has always been with the sport first, and the team second. The only exception to this rule is the New York Knicks. But that does not stop me from ridiculing them as I see fit and laughing at their failures (as it stands, I do a lot of laughing). Anyway, just to make sure we are clear on this: I will most likely pick against the Giants again. I will root for them to win, of course, but I refuse to sit and watch with a wool-cloth pulled over my head believing they will win the rest of their regular season games. In fact, Ill kill the suspense now: they will lose to the Eagles in Week 10, to the Redskins in Week 13, and I officially put them on Upset Alert for Week 16 when the Ragin Cajun Jake Delhomme and his Panthers come to town. So start mixing the Hatorade now, because were going to need it. Anyway, it looks like this will be the last time my column prints before Election Day. That might be a good thing Ill be hunkered down in my media fortress until the morning of Nov. 5, surrounded by radio and television and clutching my keyboard as this thing plays out. The general public will be better off if I remain low-key and out-of-sight. Right now, its hard to say whats going to happen. Barack Obama has a strong lead in the polls, but that means little to me Ive garnered a certain distrust for the network pollsters ever since they butchered the 2004 election. Plus, John McCain seems to have adopted a sort of machismo aura; he acts like he knows something that the rest of us dont, and it concerns me. The local campaign spectrum is far more predictable. My own conclusion is that Sandy Treadwell will lose, which is unfortunate. He seemed to provide a fiscally conservative voice that didnt cross over into rhetoric. Hey, for us moderates here in the Adirondacks (we do exist), its not often that a pro-choice Republican from Essex County comes along and has a real chance at making it to Washington. I just hope Im wrong... And a Kirsten Gillibrand victory may not be a bad thing, either. After watching her square-off with Treadwell, the two candidates dont seem to differ all that much on policy, and I truly believe that two more years of Gillibrand wont hurt. From my perspective, Mike Oot needs divine intervention to upset John McHugh in the 21st Congressional. His campaign came on too little, too late, and he hasnt been present enough in the North Country to really sway the voters in towns like Tupper Lake and Plattsburgh. In Vermont, Id like to see Jim Douglas keep his office in Montpelier for a few more years and I dont think Gaye Symington will send him packing. Ive had the pleasure of meeting Gov. Douglas a few times, and he has that rare political ability to remember a face, whether youre a fellow lawmaker or a snot-nosed reporter from a small weekly in Shelburne. Whatever happens, Im certainly not ready for four years of Tina Fey guest appearances on Saturday Night Live, no matter how funny she is. If McCain somehow wins the election, I hope he proves himself to be a true maverick, and somehow manages to ditch his side-kick. So thats it, I suppose. Time to take our seats and watch history play itself out. And as far as the election is concerned, lets prepare to support our future leaders, whomever they may be. In other words, break out the Gatorade not the Hatorade. Chris Morris is the news editor at Denton Publications. He can be reached at chrism@denpubs.com

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