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Turkeys and Pilgrums (or is it Pilgrims)

At a joint tonight a dude greeted me with, How was your Bird? He was talking about Thanksgiving dinner. I chuckled and wondered to him how strange it is in America nearly the entire population eats turkey on Thanksgiving Day. Struggle to think of someone you know eating tuna that day. The dude agreed to that indeed, a collective United States turkey dinner eat off, if one thinks about it, is a bit weird. Celebrating Thanksgiving is one more thing I do without knowing why. Either I didnt listen well in school during my lessons about the Pilgrim (I dont even know if its Pilgrim or Pilgrum), feast, or we werent taught it in earnest. I dont know which, but I do wonder why were allowed to call Pilgrims (I looked it up, its grim), Pilgrims. Isnt in this day and age, calling Pilgrims, Pilgrims, politically incorrect? Like I said, I really dont know what a Pilgrim is, but if there is a school whose ball teams are called the Feasting Pilgrims, shouldnt there be a town meeting at which the school team names be changed? Indeed Black Friday may soon be, African American Friday. Thats a stretch for a joke, but hey, dont be surprised, and remember you heard it here first. Turkey, Pilgrims, pumpkin pie, cranberry sauce, football, stuffing, most all of us fall in line and do it up on Thanksgiving Day. But I wonder how many of us could explain what and why were celebrating? An unofficial survey I took this weekend turned up several accounts. One person told me she only knew one thing; Pilgrims were kind of like the Amish. Gee thanks, that told me a lot. Four gals working in a bookstore collectively explained to me that the Pilgrims slaughtered the Indians, which they said wasnt too fine a way to say thank you to the Indians for hunting down food for the Pilgrims first Thanksgiving feast. I want to believe the bookstore girls, because they work in a bookstore. Another lady told me she wasnt sure of the first Thanksgiving story, but she had read in the paper it was a vegetarian meal, no Turkey to be found. If pressed I relate Pilgrims and Thanksgiving to Chris Columbus and those three ships of which I know the names of two, the Pinta and the Santa Maria. When I think of Columbus, I see him wearing Pilgrim clothes, you know the white bibs, knickers, and the big belt buckles on the black hats, and cloggy shoes (Wearing those clunkers its no wonder the Indians hunted better). Hold a gun to my head and I have no idea what Columbus wore. I see Chris Columbus at the first Thanksgiving. If not, he at least knew some of the Pilgrims personally. Thats what I feel I know about the Thanksgiving story. Obviously Im very confused. But hey, you tell me. I dont care what the first Thanksgiving story is, because if we really all did know, Id still find it strange how many of us celebrate so uniformly on that day. We all eat Turkey for Thanksgiving. It freaks me.

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